The vast empty football-less summer leads to a few strange rumours, but Usain Bolt has upped the silly season ante by saying he thinks he’s good enough to play for Man United. Sir Alex Ferguson is scrambling for the chequebook as we speak.
The fastest man in history previously hooked up with the club a couple of years ago and shared tips with none other than Cristiano Ronaldo. He told Ronaldo how to maximise his speed in a sprint and in return Ronaldo revealed the secret of ignoring a simple pass to a team-mate in favour of a ridiculous shot from distance. Seemingly under the impression that was an actual trial and not just a cynical marketing exercise, Bolt reckons he’s good enough to make the grade at Old Trafford when he finally hangs up his lycra leotard.
“I definitely think I’m good enough to play for Manchester United,” Bolt claimed – not long after watching Antonio Valencia’s performance in the Champions League Final we’re guessing. “I’m good enough because I’m quick, I have a little skill,” he added, although if speed and limited ability were all that’s required of a top class footballer, then Theo Walcott would have won the Ballon D’Or for each of the last five years.
In fairness, something like this isn’t entirely unprecedented. Dimitar Berbatov has built a career and made a lot of money from sporadic 10 seconds bursts of activity at Old Trafford.
– What League Will Bolt Play In First? Betting