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Try Your Hand At Being Witty. Paul Merton Witty

by Aidan Elder | July 19, 2011

There’s a Free Bet up for grabs in this week’s Paddy Power Blog Competition. How big a free bet will be determined by you.

Our Whose Career Is It Anyway? competition is going well, but we’ve decided to give him a rest for this week. A few people said some nice things about him last week and it went to his head. He turned up to work late this morning with his underpants on his head, stinking of domestos, wielding a mop like a broadsword, shouting ‘you shower of scratch-arses – you’d be NOTHING without me *sob* *sob* – you’ve ruined my life. What time’s brunch?’.

In its place, we’ve got a tried and trusted Put In The Funniest Missing Words You Can Think Of competition. It’s that round we’ve clearly stolen from Have I Got News For You, so that’s where the Paul Merton link comes in. It’s not to be confused with ‘Paul Merson witty’ which we’d imagine is sitting in an empty room laughing uproariously as you do that ‘I got your nose’ trick on yourself. We’re looking for the funniest way to finish the below headline. There’s two words covered up, but feel free to use far in excess of two words – maybe go to as many as five or even more. There is a correct answer, but that’s not what we’re after. We want the most amusing/irreverent/just short of libellous answers you can come up with.

Win A Free Bet

On this occasion, we’re asking you to put your answers in the comments section below. Get your answers in before midnight on Sunday 24th July. Our panel of comedy experts will convene next Monday morning to pick out a winner. Just a note – it’s not officially part of the competition, but our panel of comedy experts are essentially sheep and need to be told what’s funny, so if you can get a load of ‘thumbs up’ on your comment, it won’t hurt your chances of winning. And have as many goes as you want.

The prize will start as a Free €/£50 Bet, but will increase by the princely sum of €/£1 for every retweet of this tweet or >share of this competition on Facebook. We would like to include Google+ on this, but no-one has invited us so we can’t.

Best of luck everyone. Get those thinking caps on or failing that, steal some jokes off your Jimmy Carr DVD.

– Paddy Power decision is final. Moaning will do nothing except make you feel a little better.
– Maximum prize for retweet and facebook share is £/€150.
– Entrants must have a valid account and remember that time when Man City were really crap and got relegated twice in two seasons.

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