There is no need to panic.
There’s no need to lock up your wives, mothers, sisters, nieces, grandmothers, great-grandmothers or daughters at an age of dubious legality when it comes to sexual relations. That’s because Italy isn’t in fact as close to Britain as the below map suggests and Silvio Berlusconi isn’t a hop, skip and a grope away from having a crack at the good women of the UK.
This week we revert to the tried and trusted formula of Whose Career Is It Anyway? Partly because a bit of variety is always nice, but mainly because I’ve an overly bitchy preview of the X Factor Final to write. If you’re not familiar with the game, it’s much like an STD at an 18-30 holiday resort – not too difficult to pick up. Each of the below flags represent a club that this footballing man or woman has played for in the course of his or her senior professional career, your job is to figure out what clubs they refer to and in turn deduce the identity of the person.
Get the thinking cap on and the compass out and when you think you’ve arrived at something approaching the answer, send an email to email@example.com with or without the subject line “I did not have sexual relations with that ragazza di eta incerta”. It doesn’t really matter. You’re allowed to have more than one guess, but don’t take the piss by copying and pasting acres worth of names into an email. Please note that entries in the comments section WILL NOT COUNT and may tip off a rival. Feel free to use the comments section for sending rivals down blind alleys or begging for clues that I probably won’t give you, but NO GENUINE ATTEMPTS AT ANSWERS.
As per usual, the prize will start as a Free €/£50 Bet, but hopefully grow to something far bigger. Last week’s drive to promote the competition was so successful, Paddy Power was crying into his morning champagne when I told him how much extra he had to fork out for the Free Bet so I’d like to repeat that if at all possible. For each retweet of this tweet or share on the social media platforms of Facebook, Google+ or LinkedIn, we’ll add one euro or pound to the overall prize. Simples. If we get more than one correct answer, the winner will be drawn at random and although I think this week’s one is pretty tough, I suspect we’ll get more than one correct answer.
Get your answers in before 10am on Tuesday 13th December and I’ll draw the winners at random not long after I get my daily bollocking from the boss. If you want, you can ask me questions or beg for clues in the comments section or on twitter where I cunningly blend into the community of wonderfully opinionated nutters as @PaddyPowerAidan
Best of luck!
– Paddy Power decision is final. If you moan we’ll find out where you live and throw eggs at your house.
– Max prize will be £/€150 no matter how many retweets etc. more than that we get.
– Entrants must have a paddypower.com account and must be old enough to know how the Grandstand theme music goes/used to go.