I’ve run out not-so cryptic riddles and I’ve sick of looking at maps, so this week’s competition reverts to the old fashioned tried and detested formula of a ‘fill in the missing words from the headline with a humourous alternative‘ competition. Yes, everyone thinks they’re hilarious and everyone’s going to moan when I announce the winner, but I’m going for it and until you start giving out your own free bets, you’re going to have to go with it.
That sense of impending doom isn’t helped by the headline I’ve chosen for you to amend and adorn with your wit. It’s a comedy open goal and all you need to do is tap the ball in with the funniest/insulting/thought-provoking answer you can think of. There is a right answer, but – as you can tell from my writing – I don’t care about being right as long as I can make a cheap joke out of something. That’s how I roll.
Next week, our panel of comedy experts will meet to decide upon the winner and no doubt someone will be upset and someone else’s dreams of a career in stand-up comedy will be in tatters. Chin up – if Jo Brand can make it, anyone can. Without further ado, here’s this week’s slice of asking for trouble:
For this competition, please use the comments section. It doesn’t matter if anyone else can see your attempts. Well, it matters insofar as they might think you have a crap sense of humour, but in terms of the mechanic of the competition, it doesn’t matter. You’re allowed to have more than one guess. You’re allowed infinite guesses, as long as your infinity ends at 10am on Tuesday April 3rd, 2012 at which point I’ll summon the forces of comedy and pick out the entry judged to be most amusing.
Not long after that, we’ll get a load of moaniness, but to limit that, why not try and get inside our heads a bit? As a guide, when it comes to comedy, we’re more Mighty Boosh than My Family. The advice would be to work towards the vaguely surreal and if you can imagine Robert Lindsay delivering the line, then it’s probably not going to win.
The prize starts off as a £/€50 Free Bet, but I’m imploring you to – for the want of a better word – whore this competition this competition around the social networks of this world. Every time this tweet gets retweeted or this competition gets shared on Facebook, LinkedIn or the other ones, I’ll add one europound to the prize. You really should do it because (a) it’s the nice thing to do and (b) you might well be the person who benefits from the vast inflation of the prize.
Best of luck to all and you can ask any questions in the comments section or on Twitter where I’m @PaddyPowerAidan.
– Customers must be over the age of 18, have a valid paddypower.com account and remember when Giggs was considered a youthful whippersnapper and not a narky veteran.
– Maximum size of the free bet will be €/£150.
– Paddy Power decision is final and moaning will be ridiculed.