Josh Powell previews the shoot-out for a top four finish in the Premier League
With less than a month of the season remaining the fight to make the top four is hotter than a scantily-dressed Samantha Brick (she made us write that) and as unpredictable as a Djibril Cisse haircut.
RVP has spent the last few months impersonating a tea tray by carrying around 10 mugs, and his goals have Arsenal sitting pretty in third. Despite dropping points against Wigan, a side who have recently been possessed by the spirits of the 1970s Ajax team, Wenger’s men are short favourites to stay in the top four at odds of 1/7 with Paddy Power.
But Theo Walcott and Co can’t afford to relax as Chelsea roll into town on Saturday morning aiming to narrow the gap. If Didier Drogba wears his Nike thunderbolts rather than his swimming trunks it could put them right back in the mix. With the right result don’t be surprised if Paddy Power’s offer of 7/4 for a Blues’ top four finish disappears very quickly.
Amazingly, sitting two points above is a team built on less then Andy Carroll’s latest bar tab. The Magpies have been flying this season and are at 11/4 to make the cut despite a tricky run-in. Demba Ba and Papiss Cisse have been lethal in front of goal and Pardew’s style of football is arguably the most attractive thing to come out of Newcastle since Michelle Bass. (She made us write that too).
Tottenham are occupying fourth spot right now and with a relatively easy run-in are 4/7 to stay up there. But not even Benoît Assou-Ekotto’s comedy barnet can lift the gloom around White Hart Lane at the moment. Two points from five matches has led to Spurs dropping down quicker than … er, we’re out of hammy puns as it’s nearly time to wrap-up for the day.
While the Manchester clubs fight over the title these four teams are competing for a far more important prize – the right to be outclassed by a tidy Spanish outfit in a midweek game next season.
What’ll it take? True grit, that’s what.