Manchester United have agreed to splash out £22m to Arsenal for Robin Van Persie (29) and will pay him £200,000 a week — up from £80,000 at the Emirates Stadium.
It was one of the most drawn-out transfer sagas of the summer, although insiders have told the Paddy Power Blog that the deal has been a “sure thing” for several weeks.
That might have something to do with Arsene Wenger not wanting RVP to spend too much time pre-season with one of Arsenal’s biggest rivals to finish behind Manchester City.
The media world has been buzzing with news of the RVP transfer. Here’s some of the best reaction so far.
“Manchester United is pleased to announce it has reached agreement with Arsenal Football Club for the transfer of Robin Van Persie. The deal is subject to a medical and the agreement of personal terms. A further announcement will be made in due course.”
— Manchester United, tonight.
“I could see Manchester United winning the league next year, now they’ve got Van Persie. If he performs like he did last year then him and Rooney will just be an incredible partnership.”
– Unemployed Messiah, Harry Redknapp speaking to BBC Sport
“From a defensive point of view, having to contend with Rooney and Van Persie is the kind of thing that will give centre-halves nightmares.”
— Former Manchester United defender Gary Pallister. Although centre-halves are also known for nightmares about not finishing their exams, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, and iPod batteries going dead while listening to Phil Collins.
“Van Persie played on his own last season. He played virtually as a lone striker, if he did that at Old Trafford it would allow Wayne to drift off him and take up that position he takes up in the hole. It could be fantastic and not something any defence will want to cope with.”
— The other half of United’s great 90s defence, Steve Bruce, talks about Wayne Rooney’s hole.
“It’s a huge boost. He’s a terrific world class player and it’s great to bring in players of that ability and give everyone a boost.”
Michael Carrick heaps the praise on hos newest team-mate. Although was later fined by the Advertising Standards Watchdog for excessive promotion of a brand of chocolate bar in a two sentence soundbite.
“Funny, I really thought @Persie_Official was different. But he turned out to be just another mercenary, heartless, selfish little s**t.”
— Piers Morgan has a cry on Twitter.
“can’t blame him for wanting to win trophies, surely Piersy?”
— Sometimes QPR midfielder Joey Barton speaks the truth to Mr Morgan.
“Welcome to Manchester @Persie_Official!! Ready to win some silverware? #manutd”
United defender and enemy of the English language, Rio Ferdinand welcomes the Dutchman, possibly forgetting that Manchester United and Arsenal won exactly the same amount of trophies last year (0).
“Gutted van Persie is going 2 utd good player but if he doesn’t want 2 play for arsenal then it was best 2 get rid of him R.I.P RVP.”
— Jockey AP McCoy. Straight talking from one of sport’s toughest men.
“It’s sad to lose a player of his quality. He had a year left on his deal so we didn’t have the choice.”
– Arsene Wenger isn’t happy about losing his star player, but insists he had little option.
Paddy Power has cut Robin van Perise’s odds to finish as top Premier League goalscorer
“Manchester United will not pay “silly money” for players.”
— Alex Ferguson. Talking through the other side of his mouth a while back.
“It was a great talk not just about football, but also about life in general. I was pleasantly surprised. This was probably one of the best conversations I have ever had with a player. It’s pretty rare to have such a good talk with a player.
— Holland boss Louis van Gaal. On giving RVP the news that Klaas-Jan Huntelaar was his No1 striker for holland from now on.
“He’s a great player – he can only make us strong.”
Tom Cleverley gets a bit Chinese Communist Party to describe his feelings at van Persie’s arrival.
“Robin Van Persie has failed a medical at Manchester United. He has a severely damaged back after carrying a full squad last season.”
— @MarioBaloltelli, parody, via Twitter.
“Sad that an AFC player has gone to a team who use to consider us rivals! God forbid a big team comes in for vermaelin! Would he stay?”
So shocked was Arsenal legend, Ian Wright Wright Wright that he lost the ability to spell on Twitter.
“Would be interesting to know @Piersmorgan‘s view on internet trolls. His Robin Van Persie tweets fit right into that description. Nice guy”
Charlatans front man and breakfast cereal inventor, Tim Burgess is just one of several billion people who have pointed out Piers Morgan is a massive hypocrite.
“There’s no news on Van Persie. Our fans want him to stay so you can understand they are excited. Anything I could say about van Persie would be a lie because he’s our player and that’s it.
— Arsene Wenger in The Sun two days ago. Liar, liar pants on fire.