A silly goatee. A remarkable likeness to an overweight Spanish waiter. And a manager who is always one dodgy press conference away from completely losing his mind. Who doesn’t love a bit of Rafa Benitez?
After Chelsea’s 2-0 FA Cup win over Middlesbrough on Wednesday night Rafa decided to completely ignore the positive result and the prospect of meeting Manchester United in the quarter-final. Instead he decided to slag off the board, insult the fans and praise his own past achievements. That’s the hat-trick Rafa!
In celebration of Benitez cracking up at Stamford Bridge, here are his five best managerial rants.
1. Laying the smack-down on the Di Matteo fan club
‘I have been in charge in football for 26 years, I won the Champions League, I won the Fifa Club World Cup, the FA Cup, the Italian Super Cup, the Spanish league twice, nine trophies – all the trophies you can win at club level. So this group of fans are not making any favourites with the team and they are singing and wasting time preparing banners. They have to concentrate on supporting the team, that’s what they have to do.’
‘Chelsea gave me the title of interim manager, which is a massive mistake. I’m the manager. The fans are not helping us. At the end of the season I will leave. They don’t have to worry about me.’
2. Slamming Liverpool’s owners and name-dropping John the milkman
‘I prefer not to talk too much about Liverpool because I feel really sorry for the fans. I was watching the fans during the recent Merseyside derby and I was really sad.’
‘We have a saying in Spanish, which is: ‘White liquid in a bottle has to be milk’. What does this mean? It means that after 86 points and finishing second in the league in 2009, what changed?’
‘The Americans…they changed everything.’
‘So, white liquid in a bottle: milk? You will know who is to blame. White liquid in a bottle. If I see John the milkman in the Wirral, where I was living, with this bottle, I’d say, ‘It’s milk, sure’.’
3. Offending every Everton fan in the world
‘When you play against the smaller teams at Anfield you know the game will be narrow.’ (After the 0-0 draw between Everton and Liverpool in 2012)
4. Calling Roy Hodgson a priest in flip-flops (kind of)
‘I think that Mr Hodgson, he doesn’t understand. Every single press conference is even worse than the last one. He’s talking about things that he doesn’t know.’
‘Some people cannot see a priest on a mountain of sugar.’
‘Instead of talking about the flips or the flops, he has to concentrate on his players, try to do his best. He has a good job to do.’
5. Putting Sir Alex Ferguson firmly in his place