Her Majesty, aka @Queen_UK, is already giddy for the Ascot Gold Cup, but in the meantime she tells the Paddy Power Blog why she’s keeping a close eye on Camilla and the Middletons.
Royal Ascot week. Or, as the Keeper of the Privy Purse likes to call it, “transfer a sizable percentage of the civil list to one’s bookmaker week”.
The DoE is giving it a miss this year, on account of recovering from his operation, but the old boy managed to knock up a round of bacon sandwiches for breakfast whilst one dealt with the morning’s State Papers (Racing Post).
Charles and Camilla have been keeping one company in the carriage whilst the DoE is away, although, whilst Charles knows roughly where to sit on a horse, he’s not renowned for his racing skills. Told him the going was firm and he thought one was suggesting he need a cushion for the Royal Box.
Called the new Governor of the Bank of England to warn him that one was betting on a scale he’s probably not experienced in Canada. He said to call if quantitative easing was required.
Day one didn’t end wonderfully, one doesn’t mind telling you, although the bookies apparently made a killing on the colour of one’s hat (and come to think of it, Camilla did take an unusual interest in what one was wearing before we left the palace. Shrewd operator, that one). Went for a matching coat. If there’s one thing this fashion Queen knows how to do it’s colour block.
Might put the Irish economy on a race, “bet small and frequent”, as the Queen Mother always used to say.
Still, all hopes for one’s horse Estimate in the Gold Cup on Thursday. The DoE named him Estimate, mainly because if he wins on Thursday we’ll be able to finally look at the estimate for repairing the roof at Buckingham Palace without sending the Treasury into a terminal decline.
Just hoping Princess Beatrice doesn’t make an appearance, to be honest. The last thing we need is one of her hats startling the horses.
Having Mr and Mrs Middleton in the Royal Box on Thursday. They part-own a horse in the Gold Cup apparently (the DoE says it’s “probably the arse end”) so having them over in the Royal Box was the least one could do. Just hoping there isn’t a repeat of Derby Day last year when Mr Middleton asked The Countess of Wessex for a larger and lime, thinking she was a waitress. Awkward.
Mrs “we’re all horse owners here, I do wish you’d call me Carole” Middleton will no doubt be placing her usual £2.50 each way bets and wondering why she isn’t winning enough to pay off the mortgage. Although one can relate, quite frankly, having spent the last year trying to pay off the mortgage of Cyprus by way of betting slips alone.
Spotted the chief executive of Tesco on the way out yesterday, presumably looking for suitable burger material. Mr and Mrs Middleton’s horse is looking nervous already.
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