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Serial bullshitter Joe Kinnear is at it again with more made up facts about himself

by Rob Dore | July 2, 2013
NO ORDINARY JOE - Already Kinnear has made an impact at Newcastle. Just not the one most fans would have wanted (pic: Inpho)

NO ORDINARY JOE – Already Kinnear has made an impact at Newcastle. Just not the one most fans would have wanted (pic: Inpho)

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one. – Albert Einstein

Joe Kinnear quotes

When Joe Kinnear was appointed as the Director of Football at Newcastle last month he received a less than enthused response from the fans and the media. Responding to the negative comments he received, an enraged Joe went a little too far with some of the claims about his own achievements. He was lambasted and ridiculed online for some of the fantastical claims he made. However, clearly he doesn’t care less about what other people think or indeed about what actually happened.

In this interview printed in the Shields Gazette today, Kinnear feeds us more dubious facts and flights of fantasy about his own career.

“Every top club in the land has got one [a director of football]. We haven’t – that’s the difference. The manager can’t do everything. I’m probably the only football manager to be a director of football. I don’t know any other ex-managers who have.”

Other than: World Cup winner Leonardo at PSG. Barry Fry at Peterborough. Fernando Hierro at Malaga. To mention just a few.

“I’ve been a manager for 35 years. I’ve been Manager of the Year. I’ve won every award there is in football as a player.”

Ah now Joe, hold your horses there. Technically it has been 30 years since your first managerial appointment. You haven’t managed for four years so, generously not deducting your periods of unemployment, it’s more like 26 years.
Also, whilst you had a successful playing career, you most certainly did not win everything in the game. You didn’t win a single league title at any level.

“I think all those qualities put me head and shoulders above every other director of football.”

That’s what a good lie will do.

“Some directors of football have never played the game.

Okay, we’ll give you this one.

“I’m lending my experience as a manager for all those years – 10 years at Wimbledon, two years at Nottingham Forest, two years winning promotion at Luton and, of course, almost two years at Newcastle. I would still be there had it [a heart attack] not occurred.”

We’re being rather pedantic but you spent less than seven and a half years at Wimbledon, less than one year at Nottingham Forest and you were only in charge at Newcastle for 18 games. Of which you managed to win just four so if you were still manager, Newcastle might be playing in the Football Conference by now.

If nothing else Joe will keep us entertained throughout the season as he reimagines and remoulds his career as he sees fit. With his ability to spout this level of bullshit and nonsense I’m starting to fear for my job.

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