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VIDEO: Efan Ekoku! French women release the best awful football song of recent times

by Aidan Elder | July 10, 2013

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We love a good old fashioned football song around the Paddy Power offices. The mid-tempo attempt at an inspirational anthem. The squad swaying in not quite unison. The complete acceptance of off key singing. And if we’re lucky, a John Barnes rap.

The French do things slightly differently however and as their women’s team head into the European Championships, they’ve teamed up with the ‘cream of French music’ for something truly different. And by ‘different’, we do in fact mean ‘awful’. Not even some nifty freestyle footballing can save it. Does anyone even say ‘nifty’ anymore?

Like racism, sexism and by extension, Jim Davidson’s career, Euro-trance music is one of those things we go to bed every night praying for an immediate end to. It’s called ‘Everyone With The Girls’. Not satisfied with the horrific music, they also launch provide us with some of the best lyrics you’ll hear this side of a Cheryl Cole album. Highlights include:

  • We want to break free on the dancefloor, forget all your problems with the music we love [IN FRENCH]
  • I want to shake it, shake it, shake it [IN ENGLISH]
  • I want to whack it, whack it, whack it [IN ENGLISH]

And yes, there is a guy wearing a Santa hat in July, but that’s not even the weirdest part of the video. That’s reserved for 1:13 minutes in where the refrain seems to be ‘Efan Ekoku, Efan Ekoku’. Who would have guessed that the former Wimbledon striker would be the inspiration for a new generation of terrible French music?

WARNING: After watching this video you may feel like neither ‘shaking it’ nor ‘whacking it’. It’s still well worth a watch.

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