January is coming to a close which means either one of two things. You’re saving up because on February 14 you’re going to be expected to provide a token of your love for someone, which they probably won’t like, but you’re expected to do it anyway. Or, you’re planning on taking Paddy to the cleaners with a whole host of juicy Champions League knock-out ties.
Either way a few quid in your back pocket would go a long way.
These Stupid Punts might not quite be the right way to go about bagging that cash, but with a sprinkling of luck they could be going to collect, and taking their seat in the Punting Hall of Fame. After all, if you never have a dream, how will you ever have a dream come true?
Here are a few stat bombs to accompany your craziest bets on the Premier League this weekend.
Scorecast: Marouane Chamakh to score first and Crystal Palace to beat
One punter has stuck 10p on at 1000/1!
- These two sides have met 34 times in their history and only once has the game ended 3-1. Unfortunately it went Arsenal’s way in February 1993
- Marouane Chamakh has scored two league goals away from home from just six shots. That’s a conversion rate of 33 per cent. Suck on that Luis Suarez
- The last time Palace won 3-1 away from home was almost two-and-a-half years ago against Brighton in the Championship
Marouane Chamakh’s conversion rate might have the hottest keepers in the league sweating, but in all honesty he isn’t likely to pose much of a threat on his return to the Emirates. Palace’s record doesn’t make great reading at Arsenal and a 3-1 scoreline puts this bet near the top of the ‘unrealistic scale’ we have in our heads.
Scorecast:Steven Gerrard to score first but West Brom to win 5-2
One punter is on at 2000/1
- Steven Gerrard is in red-hot form in front of goal with three goals to his name in his last three Premier League appearances
- West Brom have beaten Liverpool 5-2 on two previous occasions. At home in 1953 and away in 1951
- The last team to lose 5-2 away to West Brom was Coventry in the league in November 1984
West Brom are no strangers to scoring five past the big clubs at home after hitting five past Man United in Sir Alex Ferguson’s last game in charge. Liverpool’s defence and Gerrard’s goal scoring streak play into the hands of a Stupid Punt which has history, if not logic, on its side.
Scorecast: Mapou Yanga-Mbiwa to score first and Newcastle to beat Sunderland 10-0 (Yes, that’s meant to be ten)
One punter has £1 on at 4000/1
- Newcastle have never scored 10 past Sunderland. The most they have managed is six which they have racked up in three different Tyne-Wear Derbies. Once in 1920, once in 1955, and once in 1956
- Yanga-Mbiwa has made 106 appearances for club and country since he last managed to find the back of the net – for Montpellier in October 2011
- Sunderland’s biggest ever league loss is 8-0, a scoreline which has defeated the Black Cats on three occasions in their history
There are no words…
Apparently some Geordies are even more bias than we first feared.
- Have your own effort of making the Punting Hall of Fame with all the latest Premier League odds here: Desktop | Mobile