It’s Grand National week, so you’d be forgiven for thinking that everyone in Paddy Power is frantically pouring over the Racing Post in search for the winner. And in Sportsbook, you wouldn’t be far wrong – although the chances of picking the winner are a different story.
Down the hallway though, through corridors we’ve never been brave enough to venture down, hides a whole new world of Paddy Power.com. These are the e-gaming guys, and rumours are they’re the best in the business. Luckily we still have nicer hair though.
So while your Nan hogs the race card trying to find a National horse with the same name as your baby cousin, take a spin on all the other gadgets PP has to offer. That way you’re almost certainly on to a winner…
It’s all debauchery and filth in Vegas. We’ve seen the movies. Sleeping with hookers, fighting Mike Tyson, getting a tattoo, it’s not ideal when you’re in work a few days later. Luckily though, with our Vegas app, you can avoid the danger of waking up next to an angry tiger by enjoying the strip from the comfort of your own couch.
- Paddy Power Vegas is the home of the Lucky Hand Pants. They’re kind of like pants, and kind of like gloves and apparently they’re the latest trend in 2014. The Vegas team assured us that their ‘lucky fingers get more action’, but then we asked them to put some pants on and to get out of our office
- One punter who certainly did get lucky was on the Luxor Valley Slot this year. An £18 spin returned £90k. Not bad for one click of a button
Then there’s Games. The lads in product development are very excited because they put down the latest Big Bang Theory boxset to bring all new ‘Side Games’ on the iPad. Alright it’s not an overly exciting name but these guys are the tech nerds, not the PR spin merchants. The feature is pretty cool because it lets you play games without leaving the Sportsbook pages on tablet, and that makes up for the fact they watch terrible TV series’.
- Peter from Lincoln landed the Adventures in Wonderland Jackpot of £165K from just a £6 spin. A hat tip to you fine sir.
- There’s also some ‘Exclusive to PP’ games on here made by the lads at Cayetano. And we’re not using the word ‘Exclusive’ in the way Sky Sports use it, when in fact the story was reported two days ago in the National press. These are really exclusive, you won’t get them anywhere else.
- For the launch of Rainbow Riches the Games folk thought it would be hilarious to hire a midget. Unfortunately that plan came up short. That’s not even a joke, the small man never showed up.
Ah poker, where having a nickname like ‘Texas Dolly’ is normal and doesn’t make you sound like a stripper. Don some shades and a hoody if you want to convince yourself you’re a pro, or just chill out in your pants and play online with us. That way when you get dealt pocket aces you can whoop and holla as much as you want without worrying about anybody seeing your poker face. Haha, in your face mystery online opponents.
- Last year Ian Simpson got to enter the Irish Open for free because he was the longest lasting online qualifier in a previous tournament. He went on to win €265,000 in prize money and, presumably lost most of it, by then immediately proposing to his girlfriend
- Poker could also lead to you becoming president, kind of. Richard Nixon’s campaign for Congress in 1946 was funded by $6,000 he won on a poker game while he was in the United States Army.
If you’ve ever ventured into the Casino after a night on the tiles and a dirty kebab, you’ll probably have very little recollection of what you saw. We guess though that it was pretty dingy, smelt funny and included a number of people less than impressed to see you stumbling around the one-arm bandits. The PP Casino takes away all those problems in one foul swoop.
- One punter won £240k over two days playing Roulette in the casino, which, if we get the abacus out means for those 48 hours he was averaging an annual wage of £43.8 million. Eat your heart out Wayne Rooney.
- The four Kings on cards in the casino are not random, they’re all named after famous historical people. Hearts is Charlemagne, diamonds is Julius Caesar, spades is King David and clubs is Alexander the Great. Put that in the knowledge bank. One day you’ll wow a really attractive person in a pub quiz with that stat. Probably.
It’s just like PP Casino but in this one you get to interact with real people. YES, REAL PEOPLE. We know that’s scary and sitting behind your computer is far more comfortable but if you just put on some pants and gave it a try we think you’d really like it.
- The biggest win the Casino has paid out in the last year was a whopping £340,000
- Despite trying to cater for everyone’s needs with a variety of attractive dealers, the quietest day on Live Casino is Valentine’s Day. Confusing really. What doesn’t say ‘I love you’ like an evening of Blackjack on the laptop?
PP has Bingo as well. We don’t recommend using a dabber on your tablet, that will only damage the screen, but we do suggest kicking back and playing some good old-fashioned bingo without having to go to your local church hall and sponsor some charity nonsense.
- Someone won almost £135,000 on a bingo game called ‘Bouncy Balls’. We’ll just leave that to your imagination.
- This year they have already had celebrity ‘A-listers’ such as fortune-teller Russell Grant, Chico from the X Factor and Duncan from Blue drop in to give players a hand. They tell us that if that doesn’t tempt punters in nothing will.