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World Cup 2014 – A spoofer’s guide to…Greece

by Rob Dore | June 3, 2014

Fun Fact

In Greece people celebrate the “name day” of the saint that bears their name rather instead of celebrating their birthday.
Unless the bible has undergone some serious modernisation there’ll be a lot of Britneys and Justins with no candles to blow out.

Wikipedia Fact

The first Greek tragedy was performed in 534 B.C. and was staged by a priest of Dionysus named Thespis. He also wrote and performed a part separate from the traditional tragic chorus, which also designated him as the first actor. In fact, the word “thespian” (actor) derives from his name. So he’s the one to blame for all those boring plays you were forced to go to during your school years.

National Hero

They’ve so many candidates it’s taking the piss. From Pericles to Plato, Aristotle at a push, Alexander the Great, half the characters from 300 and Troy. The greedy Greeks even claim Lord Byron as one of their heroes for giving his life in the fight for Greek independence from the Ottoman Empire.

Football Pedigree

Pretty poor, even for a relatively small country, right up until they won the European Championship in 2004. Granted they did so by playing the kind of football Sam Allardyce would slate for being archaic but they won it all the same. One quarter-final appearance since completes the sum of their achievements on the football field.
They didn’t qualify for their first World Cup until 1994, where they reached the group stage. They missed out on the next three World Cups before making another group stage appearance in South Africa in 2010.

Acceptable National stereotype

Inventors of democracy and they make a decent salad.

Unacceptable National Stereotype

Hairy loudmouths who love a good riot.

Don’t Be Surprised If They

Qualify out of their group for the first time at a World Cup . It’s a tight group but they’ll rightly feel they can take points off the three other sides.

Odds to win World Cup 2014: 250/1

Having won Euro 2004 with a team no better than the current one, why not?: Desktop | Mobile

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