We won’t lie, we’re pretty sick of all the daily transfer rumours, and every second day seeing another spoof “leaked photo” of a team’s new kit for the 2015/16 season. So we went about doing what we do best – using our contact book to get our hands on something concrete to give to you.
Thanks to knowing some people that know some people that rob some people, we’ve managed to secure official photos (ahem) of next season’s kits for every team in the league BEFORE anyone else. #InTheKnow
The ink had barely dried on some of the new sponsor contracts but in fairness, who would say no to a sneaky tenner for a quick photo?
Without further ado, I give to you the 2015/16 Premier League kits and updated sponsors.
Arsenal – Bang and Olufsen
Looks stylish, sounds fancy and foreign. Detractors suspect finished product somewhat lacking.
Aston Villa – Nuts Magazine
The Villa manager is a bit of a massive lad, a bit of an Ebeneezah Geezah who enjoys his Britneys. ‘Naw mean mate?
Bournemouth – Saga Holidays
Useful when you’re planning a day trip to the seaside.
Chelsea – Facebook
One of the most successful organisations in the world now, but only formed in 2004.
Crystal Palace – Marshall Amps
Popular enough, and they make a lot of noise.
Everton – Pepsi
Big name, but most people prefer their rivals.
Leicester – Babestation
You know, because of someone’ s son and a few other players’ exploits in Thailand. Gas fellas.
Liverpool – Amstrad
Big in the 80s and not likely to make any sort of comeback anytime soon.
Man City – Mr Kipling
Following the Yaya Toure incident of 2014, this move was for the best. Endless supplies of….
Manchester United – Apple
Market leaders for a long time. But they’ve been a bit dodgy since their best-known leader departed.
Newcastle – Ryanair
Sure, their customers are always complaining. A match made in heaven really.
Norwich – Blossom Hill Wine
Inspiring Delia since the 90s.
Southampton – DFS
They’ve always got a sale on. But only in their Liverpool branch.
Stoke – NHS dentist
You never look forward to it, but you know you have to visit them once a year.
Sunderland – Wimpy
Not the most appetising of products but they’re still around.
Swansea – Megabus
Great value for long trips up and down the country.
Tottenham – Mercedes Benz
New model every season but it plummets in value at the turn of the year.
Watford – Fiat
Dodgy product, and run by Italians. Great kit though, expect to see this adorning a silly bearded man with his mankles on show in a town near you.
West Brom – Thomas Cook
Highly likely to start their holidays in January.
West Ham – Hubba Bubba
Good for blowing bubbles, but they leave a nasty taste in your mouth.