Death has arrived, hell has frozen over and Tyson Fury is the best heavyweight boxer on the planet. And he makes up for his boring fighting style with incredible views on, well, pretty much anything you ask him about.
Fury has the same mattress as the Queen, his wife’s there to ”cook, clean and look after these kids” and he believes that a woman’s best place is in the kitchen and “on her back”. That wasn’t going to be awkward in any way at the Sports Personality of the Year awards in Belfast, held on Sunday, when he was up against three women.
He’s also, shall we say, not the biggest fan of homosexuals.
Well, with Tyson having petitions against him winning SPOTY because of these views (50,000 ”wankers” according to Fury) we thought, how could we show our support for Britain’s number one? We all know he loves a bit of karaoke after he belted a few tunes out on winning the titles. So we bet he loves a bit of Gloria Gaynor on a Saturday night.
But since we can take a punch from ANY boxer (as long as we’re inside a titanium box. With a massive pole…. And a jet pack… and NHL padding) we decided to brighten up Tyson’s night ahead of the awards in the Odyssey.
Look at him there, flying around with more grace than a ballerina in Swan Lake. In reality, there’s more chance of the devil returning than there is of Tyson Fury wearing them to his rematch with Wladimir Klitschko, but just in case Ty, we’ve got some rainbow laces lined up!
And even if you don’t win SPOTY (UPDATE – he didn’t), take comfort in the fact that Il Divo are offering meet and greet passages for the Odyssey next May. We’ll try and get ya sorted.
Paddy Power, a Paddy Power spokesperson explained why we did what we did:
”Tyson beat the odds to become world heavyweight champion and his colourful talk since prompted our equally colourful tribute tonight. We hope he’s sees the funny side as I’m really attached to my teeth and I have a family, and it wasn’t my idea anyway””
The public loved it!
— joe.m (@joeman42) December 20, 2015
Yes we would! Just as long as we’re in that box we mentioned earlier. We did forget about one major thing though
— The Steve (@TheMightySteve) December 20, 2015
Some more pictures below
This man admires the mural from afar
While this lad is about as close as we ever want to get to Tyson!
Not to worry Tyson, you’re still the PRIDE of UK Boxing